Sexercise

Anything with the word "sex" in it is bound to up my page views this week.

So I read this crazy article about a sexpert at Indiana University describing women as having exercise induced orgasms. Spinning bikes, the Princess Chair, and chin-ups bars were cited as the most common (and soon to be the most popular) pieces of equipment for women to get off on. Next time you see me doing 50 crunches you might even guess I'm trying for a "coregasm".

NOT. In all my years of over the top workouts I have always enjoyed myself, but not that much. It's more likely that many of us 5:00 a.m. gals are staying away from what's home in bed, and wearing ourselves out so we have an excuse for later. However, if you hear me moan it may be pleasure for a change, not the usual back spasm or knee tweak or shoulder ache. If you hear ANY woman moan during her workout, from now on, I suggest that you NOT ask if everything's okay. You may get an answer you really don't want to hear.

Today the pool was really busy. I got to swim alone for awhile (pleasure there), but I had to share my lane through most of the rest of my 80 laps. At least we didn't have to do circles (although that might be a turn on, who knows). Anyway, I described myself to Sharin' as a "pool slut", because I had had multiple partners (five? six? but who's counting) during the time I was swimming. None of them were even cute like the guy that got in next to the wall with her.

We work out for any number of reasons: to look good, to feel good, to keep from turning into a blotto, to have fun, to feel better about life, and to get the workout buzz. We may also be working out because we can't sleep, we're stressed to the max, our partners are just a constant piss-off, we have no friends and no life, and we are turning into zombies so we just get up in the morning and go because we need brains.

Some come to the gym mostly to socialize and Won't Shut Up. I think in the two hours I was in the pool Stefanaki did 5 laps because he was yakking up anyone that would listen, and I didn't want to. I finally said: "I'm a Librarian. Do I need to shush your ass???" (I did, but I didn't). I changed lanes for yet another partner.

But then I got the lane to myself again as I finished up, which felt good. Nothing over the top, nope, no chlorine scented, bubbly, half naked, wild wet sensations there, just the usual happy tired now I'm starved kind of high. Uh, starved for food, that is. Don't get any funny ideas.